Question: I
have a problem with my father. I converted to Islam many years ago, but
he is against Muslims and has mocked some practices of Muslims. I believe
he is prejudiced out of ignorance, false pride, and personal insecurity.
He is also an emotionally very unstable man and during my childhood has
done many bad things to me of which I cannot even speak here. Must I have
a relationship with him? Every time I try and connect to him in a respectful
manner, I find that I must retreat in order to maintain my sanity and the
scrap of respect that I believe I owe him on account, that as a Muslim,
I am obliged to respecting him as my father nevertheless. However, after
all that has happened, I cannot imagine sustaining a relationship with
him. Is there any justification for me keeping away from him under these
circumstances?
Answer: I
understand the trauma through which you must be going regarding this relationship.
If your father has broken all the limits in your childhood and is persisting
with some wrong attitude, you are not required to have any sort of relationship
with him -- although if you do so, you shall be greatly rewarded.
Blood relationships hold great sanctity
in Islam. But if a person violates the sanctity of such a relationship,
the affected person is not required to maintain this relationship. Consequently,
if you sever your relationship with him or keep it very limited, then this
can in no way be objected to.
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